How to Keep Your Child Safe During an Ongoing Abuse Investigation

When a parent learns their child may have been sexually abused, the ground shifts. I’ve sat with many parents in this moment, and the worry always sounds the same: “How do I keep my child safe while everything is still being investigated?”

That fear is real. And while the investigation may feel slow or unpredictable, you still have meaningful ways to protect your child right now.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure what to do first, the insight in feeling powerless as a parent can help ground you as you take your next steps.

Understanding What Changes During an Investigation

Once an investigation begins, the situation no longer lives only within your family. Law enforcement, child advocacy teams, medical staff, and sometimes school administrators enter the picture. Each group has a role, but the person your child looks to for safety is still you.
That’s why a clear safety plan matters so much.

During an investigation, three risks usually rise to the surface:

1. Access — whether the alleged abuser can reach your child
2. Exposure — whether the child might be asked questions they’re not ready for
3. Stress — how the process affects your child’s emotional stability

You can’t manage every outside force, but you can create a safer environment around your child while investigators do their jobs.

Step 1: Control Access to the Alleged Abuser

This is the first and most important move. Even if the accused person denies everything, you do not need to wait for the case to “develop” before setting firm boundaries.

Here’s what I advise parents to consider:

• No unsupervised contact, including phone calls, FaceTime, or messaging
• Neutral exchange locations if custody orders apply
• A written plan for relatives who might unknowingly allow access

If the alleged abuser lives in the home, you’ll need immediate help from law enforcement or child protective services. Many parents feel guilt here, but your child’s physical safety has to come first.

Step 2: Strengthen School Safety

Schools often want to help but may not know details about the investigation unless you tell them. You decide how much you disclose.

You can ask the school to:

• Alert you if the accused person appears on campus
• Restrict who can pick up your child
• Allow your child to meet privately with a counselor
• Provide a quiet, supervised space on difficult days

Record every request by email so there’s a written trail.

Step 3: Adjust Daily Routines to Reduce Risk

Small shifts in routines can dramatically improve safety. Parents often tell me these steps help their child feel protected without feeling punished:

• Change drop-off and pick-up routines
• Increase supervision during sports, clubs, or after-school time
• Monitor apps and messaging more closely
• Keep your home environment predictable and calm

Children often cling to routine when everything else feels chaotic. The more stability they sense, the more grounded they become.

Step 4: Prioritize Your Child’s Emotional Safety

A child under investigation pressure may:

• Withdraw
• Become restless or irritable
• Fear they’ll get in trouble
• Ask if you’re angry with them
• Worry about having to “talk again” to adults

Your responses can shape how they process the experience. I use these trauma-informed guidelines:

• Keep conversations short and gentle
• Remind your child they did nothing wrong
• Avoid pushing for details
• Praise their courage for telling the truth

And when emotional strain grows heavy, a licensed therapist who specializes in child trauma can make a sharp difference.
Parents often ask whether therapy risks “interfering” with the investigation. The answer is no — trauma therapists know how to support a child without stepping into investigative territory.

At this stage, many parents also want privacy. If you’re weighing how to move forward without exposing every detail, this piece on protecting your child while staying private offers guidance on balancing safety and discretion.

Step 5: Coordinate With Law Enforcement and Advocacy Teams

During the investigation, you may interact with:

• Detectives
• Child advocacy center staff
• Forensic interviewers
• Victim advocates

These professionals see families in crisis every day. Still, it’s normal to feel unsure about what you’re allowed to say or ask.

Here’s what helps many of the parents I work with:

• Ask investigators what to expect next
• Request updates when things go quiet
• Let them know if your child seems overwhelmed
• Ask who your main point of contact is

If your child must attend a forensic interview, reassure them that it is not a test and they are not in trouble. The interviewer knows how to move at your child’s pace, and your role is simply to support them before and after.

Step 6: Build a Support Network Around Your Child

Children heal best when support comes from more than one direction.

You might include:

• A therapist experienced in child trauma
• A pediatrician who can monitor physical or emotional symptoms
• A school counselor
• A nonjudgmental relative or family friend your child trusts

Parents often underestimate how much they need support too. When you’re emotionally steadier, your child feels safer.

Step 7: Consider When Legal Guidance Becomes Part of Safety Planning

Many parents wait to talk to a lawyer because they think it’s “too soon” or they don’t want to overreact. But speaking with an attorney early often strengthens safety planning.

A lawyer can help you understand:

• Protective steps available during ongoing investigations
• What you’re allowed to request from schools or other agencies
• How civil cases work alongside criminal investigations
• What timelines might look like in Arkansas abuse cases

You can speak with our legal team anytime if you want help protecting your child during this process.

Closing Thoughts: Your Child Looks to You for Safety — and You’re Showing Up

You may not feel brave right now, but your child sees something different. They see the parent who listens, shields, comforts, and stays steady when the world feels frightening.

You don’t need perfect answers. You just need the next step — and you already took it by learning how to keep your child safe while the investigation continues.

I’ve watched parents walk through this darkness and bring their children through it too. You’re not facing this alone, and your instincts to protect are stronger than you realize.